Wyoming is the worst

Wyoming: Home to sagebrush (the symbol of lifelessness).

Wyoming sucks.  We hate Wyoming with a passion.  If it weren’t for Yellowstone National Park, which is only open during the summer, I’d say that place should be blown to smithereens.  It is the worst state in the country.  Yes, even worse than New Jersey.

Why do we hate it so much?  Let us count the ways …

1. Seeing sagebrush tumble across the highway was the most entertaining thing we witnessed.  That is until we saw sagebrush blowing in the blustery wind, then we almost had a seizure from excitement.

That fence is holding back the threat of a sagebrush attack.

2. Verizon must have no customers there, because we had absolutely no service.  Why bother when nobody lives there?

3. We didn't see any Wyoming license plates until 3 hours into the drive.  That's because the few people who live in Wyoming know how horrible it is.

4. The drive was so boring and repetitive that it looked like a video on loop.

Or just stare at this picture for 4 hours for the same effect.

5. Their idea of a rest stop is a roadside table, which is exactly what it sounds like: a picnic table on the side of the road.  Just a table out in the open on the side of the road with no protection from the elements.  There isn’t even a parking lot for people to stop.  This shows you how much they care about the tourism.  I wish we had a picture of it, but we didn’t realize that it would top the two sagebrush sightings as the most interesting thing in Wyoming.

6. There was so much snow blowing everywhere that we could barely see in front of our car.  Maybe we’d be a little bit more forgiving to Wyoming if we could actually see it.

At least it's a change of scenery.

I wish Wyoming would secede from the union because I’m embarrassed to say that it’s a part of our wonderful country.  Ayk points out if that were true, then Dick Cheney would never have been eligible to be Vice President.  And the world would be a much better place.

South Dakota: Day Two

 

Wall Drug

Before we headed to the Badlands on Saturday, we woke up and headed to Wall Drug – another tourist attraction you see billboards for almost 300 miles away.  

 

Badlands

Heading into the Badlands, I was a little worried after seeing a sign that said “Beware: Prairie Dogs Have Plague.”   Terrific!  What better time to catch a medieval disease while unemployed with no health insurance.  Ayk told me I wouldn’t have to worry unless I started playing with them.  Dammit, I really wanted one as a pet, too.

I got over that fear pretty quickly after being awestruck with the most spectacular view we had seen so far.  We both agreed it looked like Cappedocia, Turkey.  He's Turkish and has visited multiple times, and I visited once when I was 18.  His Turkish heritage is just one of the many reasons why he's so awesome.

Like I said, I wouldn’t have ever thought to come here during the winter, but seeing the landscape sprinkled with snow was breathtaking.

Mt. Rushmore

It might be a national treasure, but I still say it’s kitsch.  Don’t get me wrong – I get it.  It’s a timeless honor of our nation’s four of the greatest presidents.  It’s still rather gaudy.

Repping Maryland Pride

 Studying the maps intensely

The dumb chick who took this picture cut off George Washington's head, so here's a close up of him below:

Mt. Rushmore may not be the highlight of this trip, but it at least gives us some patriotic photos.

South Dakota: Day One

South Dakota: Home to corn based buildings, plague-ridden prairie dogs and mountains that smile right back.

South Dakota is rarely the first place people consider traveling in the winter – let alone summer – but man, are they missing out.  To tell the truth we thought South Dakota was going to be the dullest part of our drive.  We drove through there on Friday after leaving frigid Minnesota.

I was pretty skeptical, considering their biggest tourist attraction appeared to the Corn Palace.  They had puntastic billboards for the Corn Palace more than a hundred miles before the exit, so we figured we should check it out.  It’s quirky, but I dig it.

The corn mosaics on the facade are changed every year.

Shucks, they really love their corn.

We took back our cynical remarks once we passed the Missouri River.  It was absolutely stunning.  I had no idea South Dakota could be so beautiful.

We stayed the night in Wall, which is really close to Badlands and Mt. Rushmore.  I didn’t bother to take pictures of the restaurant we ate at, because our food was overpriced and bland.  It costs almost as the hotel room that night, which was a steal.  At least we saved money somewhere.

 

Midwest Tour: Milwaukee, Madison & Minnesota

Midwest: Home to dairy farms and arena destroying snowstorms.
 

Milwaukee: Brats & Beers Breakfast

After leaving Chicago on Thursday morning, we headed to Milwaukee.  We went to Milwaukee’s Brat House to fill us up before the Miller Brewery tour.

 Mike, holding Das Boot, is responsible for selling most of the Schlitz in Milwaukee, 

and probably the world.

Pretzel breads are my favorite, so you can imagine my excitement to know the brat was served on a pretzel roll.  To be honest, the brats were good, but nothing to write home about (though I'm writing about it in this blog).  The best part were the baked beans, a savory and slightly sweet mix of ground sirloin, brown sugar, maple syrup and bacon.  Clearly a recipe for awesomeness.

When was the last time you heard someone rave about baked beans?

Exactly.  That's how good these are.

Next stop: Miller Brewery.  I’ll be honest: I’m not the biggest fan of any domestic light beers – be it Miller, Coors or Budweiser.

However, that doesn’t mean I won’t enjoy some free samples while seeing one of the largest breweries in America.  And boy, is it big.  

That warehouse is the size of 5 football fields.  All of those boxes you see (and then some) are gone at the end of the day.  Say what you will about its taste, but Miller sure does know how to run a business.

Cheers to free beer and good business.  And designated driver, Ayk.

Madison: Chilly Campus and Car Issues

Ayk wanted to swing by to see the campus.  Sure, it had a waterfront view, but we weren't too impressed.

 

We also weren't happy with this part of the trip, because this is when our rental car started having issues.  We got a new one, which also had issues later that day, but we replaced that one the next day.  So far, everything's been great with that car.  Fingers crossed!

Minnesota: Buttery Burgers and Negative Degrees

Despite my stepmother’s insisting that we must visit Minneapolis, it was too cold and too far for us to swing by. We decided to stay the night in Rochester before heading to South Dakota.  I'm sure it's a cool city, but if their sports arena can't handle the winter weather, I doubt we can.

Thursday night we got dinner at Culver’s, a regional burger joint.  My friend Lucy lived in Wisconsin and recommended that we make a pit stop there.  So glad we did.  The buttered burgers were so tasty and juicy.

We finished our meal with a thick custard for dessert.  To top it off, they had the best customer service you could ever get from a fast food restaurant.

Heart attack in a bun

Woke up the Friday morning and it was –20F.  For those of you who have never experienced such brutal weather, think about the weather changing from 80F to 32F.  Then do that again.  It was that miserable.  I made the stupid mistake to leave some food in our car overnight.  Our Nutella froze solid!  We had to put our jar of chocolate spread and our loaf of bread on the dash’s heater to thaw them for breakfast.

Our makeshift Easy-Bake Oven.

Other than the mind-bogglingly low temperatures and fattening food consumed to insulate you in said crummy weather, the only items of interest were the windmills.

After that, I got nothing.  Maybe another time, Minneapolis.  Just not in the winter.

Chicago: Part 3 (Wednesday Night)

Sears Tower

I realize most of the things I did this trip were the same as last trip, but the Sears (err, Willis) Tower is one of those sites where it doesn’t hurt to go a second time.  We went a half hour before sunset, and let me tell you that it was worth it.  We stayed until nightfall.  I’ll let the pictures do the talking.

Daylight

 Skydeck

 Chicago River

 Lake Michigan

 Sunset

 Chicago River

 Lake Michigan with rising moon

 Dusk

 

 

 

Saved the best for last.

Moonlight on Lake Michigan shows different parts of the lake are frozen.

 

Portillo’s

We met up with Kon at Portillo’s after the Skydeck.  We got Chicago style dog: pickle spear, spicy peppers, relish, onions, tomato, mustard (no ketchup!) on a poppy seed bun.

Best followed with their signature chocolate cake.

B.L.U.E.S.

For authentic Chicago blues, Ayk and I headed to the north side of the city.  We wanted to go to Kingston Mines, but they were closed, thanks to the Health Department.

Comforting

Instead, we went to B.L.U.E.S., which is just across the street and owned by the same people.

While sipping some local beer and chilling to the music, I ran into Colleen, my adviser from Zeta.  Small, small world.

Colleen and me

We left the bar and head back to Kon’s in need of some sleep after a busy day.  G’night, Chicago!