Key West: Hillbillies, PePe’s and Rt 1

Campground

Looking for cheap lodging in Key West is virtually impossible.  After calling half a dozen campsites, we found one relatively close that didn’t require reservations a day in advance.  Clearly, we were scraping the barrel.  And boy, was that obvious at this site.

Right as we were about to fall asleep in our paper-thin tent, we heard, “Fuck you, you fucking punk!”  Oh great.  Hillbillies.  Ayk somehow managed to fall asleep after that first screeching, while my fear that all rednecks living at campsites carry guns kept me wide awake.  It’s an oddly specific fear, but it’s rightly justified.  The hillbilly continued: “You stupid, fucking slut!”  What a charmer.  The fight went on for a couple more minutes before someone peeled out on a motorcycle.  I’d honestly rather deal with howling coyotes than these yammering yokels.

We woke up around 5AM to the sound of feral roosters, which kept crowing until we left around 8 AM.  Eventually, we tuned them out and fell back asleep, only to be woken by naval and commercial jets flying over the campsite.  I wish we could assure you that the campsite was fragrant and didn’t reek of sulfur, or that the view of the bog was somewhat picturesque, but that was hardly the case.  At least it was a waterfront view.

Did I mention how chauvinistic this campsite was?  The women’s restroom was conveniently placed in the same area as the washing machines; whereas, the men’s area had a take-one-leave-one library.  Please.  The only thing these dim-witted hicks are reading is a paternity suit.

PePe's

Gwendy recommended that we get some breakfast at Pepe’s.  Disregarding the flimsy facade that looks like it could blow over with a stiff breeze, we ventured inside to find that the place packed, so we took the last two seats at the bar.  Pepe's had a bit of a local vibe, and the bar conversation was lively.  Ayk shared the tweet that @StephenAtHome (Stephen Colbert) had sent out the night before.  Essentially, we retweeted in real life.

 Ayk ordered the omelet with a melange of appetizing-sounding but ultimately forgettable ingredients.

My French toast was good, but it would have been better if the fruits were fresher.

Route 1
We already got pictures driving by the Beginning of Route 1 sign, but we decided to get pictures standing next to the End Route 1 sign.

As Ayk was taking this picture, a guy walked by and said, “You’re no zero,” making an astute reference to the 0 mile marker. So, that means I could be a 1.  Thanks?  At least Ayk thought the schmuck's cheesy pick-up line was funny.