As if the salted caramels weren’t enough to sate our saline quota of the day, we decided to visit the Great Salt Lake. Generally when a place is named after a geographical point of interest, the locals are proud to show it to you (e.g. Lake Tahoe). Not so with Salt Lake City. Every time I’ve visited Salt Lake City I’ve asked about visiting the eponymous lake, only to be answered with, “Why would you want to go there?” This time I finally got my foolish wish.
Pictured: Regret
After visiting, now I understand why no one goes there. It looks like a post-apocalyptic world with zombies running around, except nobody – alive or undead – was there.
The defunct lakeside hotel Saltair is eerily similar to the abandoned playgrounds of Chernobyl.
All that could be heard was the buzzing of the speeding cars on the highway. Dense smog from the nearby factory lingered in the air. And oh boy did that lake smell.
As if the saltiness of the lake weren’t pungent enough,
The only sense this place didn’t accost was the taste. But that’s simply because there was nothing there to eat.
Except maybe a rotting bird with a side of brine exoskeleton.
Leave it to this man to want to try the water. He didn't, thankfully.
I’ll be perfectly honest: I’m not the biggest fan of Salt Lake City. And I didn't make the decision solely based on the wondrously creep Great Salt Lake. The skiing is choice, my family is great, and walking around Temple Square is great – if you’re religious – but other that, there’s really nothing there. Yes, there are some cute little areas and walking in the canyon to see the aspens change color is magnificent, but otherwise I'm underwhelmed.
The city is surrounded by mountains, which sounds picturesque until you realize the smog hovering above the city is permanently stuck there because the mountains prevent the wind from sweeping it away.
The city is surrounded by mountains, which sounds picturesque until you realize the smog hovering above the city is permanently stuck there because the mountains prevent the wind from sweeping it away.
Think of a bowl of soup with steam trapped at the top of the bowl -- except it’s poisonous and not delicious.
Mm, mm toxic.
Before you tell me I’m insulting my ancestors who founded Utah with Brigham Young, stop right there. My dad read the memoirs of one of those ancestors, and apparently she even bitched about how she didn't like Salt Lake City. Guess discontent for SLC runs in the family.
When I asked for more animal friends I did not mean DEAD animal friends. Thanks for making me sad.
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